Why Must We Always Be Apart?
by SesshyLover132
Summary: “You tried to kill me.” His voice was stony, agonized. Probably from the way he died. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to I swear! I was just so angry.” I think I’m going insane, here I am talking to a ghost who probably can’t even really speak. BellaEdward
1. Preparation

-1**This is my first Twilight fic. So I will go on with the story. WARNING! THIS STORY CONTAINS NEW MOON AND ECLIPSE SPOILERS! **

**Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

I opened my eyes, groggily. Suddenly, I shot up out of bed. Today was the day. The day of the-my wedding. I looked at the ring on my finger. The face of it a long oval, with slanted rows of glittering diamonds, the band made of gold.

I sighed as I got up out of bed and proceeded to get ready to start the day. Once finished dressing I walked to my bedroom door. I opened it and stepped out only to see Alice beaming at me from the bottom of the stairs.

Alice hugged me at the bottom of the stairs, as I walked into the kitchen to get some cereal before we left for her house. "Oh Bella you'll look so beautiful in your wedding gown." Alice said, apparently she has already saw me in my wedding dress.

I nodded as I chewed my cereal. "Oh we have do your hair, and make-up. Make sure everything's perfect. All the food is ready and the band-" Alice said but I cut her off.

"B-Band. You got a band?" I asked, slightly frustrated. Why did these people constantly want to spend money on me.

"Of course silly." Alice said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. As she babbled on, I took my empty bowl and rinsed it in the sink. As soon I was done, Alice was dragging me to her shiny, yellow porsche.

Starting the engine, Alice backed out of the driveway and started heading towards her house at a very fast speed. I looked out the window, it was a rarely sunny day, in this little town of Forks, Washington. Well I wasn't to excited about getting married. But to be able to become a vampire and live forever with Edward it was worth it.

Plus Edward had said after we were married we were going to "try" as he called it. I rolled my eyes at the thought, didn't he understand that I trusted him not to hurt me. That although I was more breakable than a vampire I wasn't that breakable. And I knew if he actually did hurt me I would know it was not on purpose.

I sighed as we neared the house, I mean mansion. Really the house was huge. I opened my car door myself, knowing that Edward would not be here to do it. Since the groom was not to see the bride until the wedding.

Stepping out of the car, I followed Alice to the house. I reached to open the door but Alice was to fast. Before I could blink she had the door open and me inside next to a smiling Esme and a smug looking Rosalie.

I had no need to ask where Edward and the others were they were probably helping Edward prepare, where I did not know. Before I knew it Alice, Esme, and Rosalie had me sitting on a stool and trying different shades of powder on my face.

Soon I was in my wedding gown, it was pure white satin, strapless number with white flowers and beads sewed in on the hem, the trail was not to long but slightly shorter than others so that I wouldn't trip. My hair was curled and put up, hair-pins stopping my bangs from going in my eyes. My veil hung from a tiara that was fitted perfectly in my hair.

Esme was in a regular, light green dress that had beautiful, purple flowers scattered on it. Rosalie and Alice were in bridesmaids outfits. They were light lavender, with spaghetti straps holding them up. Of course Rosalie and Alice were two of my bridesmaids my other was Angela.

Edward's best mans were of course Emmett, Jasper, and Angela's boyfriend, Ben. I heard a sound in the distance. A car's engine roared as it drove up into the drive way. I narrowed my eyes. "You didn't" I said suspiciously.

Alice grinned. "I did" She beamed. I groaned at that. I looked out the window and sure enough in the driveway was a sleek, black limo. I sighed. Again, why did these people insist on spending money on me.

Alice grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the door. "Come on, you wouldn't want to be late for your own wedding" She said opening the door and pulling me towards the limo, Esme and Rosalie following gracefully behind us.

I got into the limo obediently, hoping to make Alice as happy as possible. The drive was slow and I grew more nervous as we approached the church. Esme patted my hand. "I know your nervous dear but everything will turn out fine just wait and see" She tried to comfort me.

I nodded hoping to satisfy her. We reached the church in less than 20 minutes. I saw my dad, Charlie, standing at the door leading into the church. Alice hugged me for encouragement, as she, Esme, and Rosalie walked into the church.

I took a deep breath and stepped towards Charlie, ready for him to lead me into the church and give me to Edward.

**So there is the first Chapter of my new story. Anyway plz review. I know I have 5 stories, including this one, that is in progress but I just couldn't resist. **


	2. The Wedding

-1**Chapter 2 is finally HERE! Alright this is chapter 2 to my story Why Must We Always Be Apart. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

I gulped as the doors to the church slowly opened. I walked slowly, careful as not to trip. My dad walked beside me, his arm interlocked with mine as we proceeded down the isle. The pianist played the music perfectly as I concentrated on not falling in my heels.

I looked through my veil towards the raised platform where Edward stood waiting. Alice, Rosalie, and Angela stood elegantly on the left side of the platform as Jasper, Emmett, and Ben stood on the right. Carlisle and Esme sat in the very first row on the right side of the church. My mom and her new husband sat in the first row on the left side.

I clutched my flowers tighter as we were nearing the platform(wow big church audience glares right, back to the story). The preacher stood in the middle of the platform ready to begin the ceremony.

I took a deep breath as Charlie, I mean dad, gave me to Edward. We stood together as the preacher began to speak. As he talked of the vows and promises my thoughts drifted(bad Bella that's a very bad time to zone out). How long after we were married would Edward wait to turn me into a vampire. How long until we "tried".

I snapped out of my thoughts as the preacher made me say my vows as Edward repeated them perfectly. "Are there any objections as to why these two should not be wed, If so speak now or forever hold your piece" The Preacher yelled.

I relaxed, I was pretty sure no one would object. But then again when was I ever lucky as someone yelled "OBJECTION!". We all turned around towards the doors as they swung open with such force the hinges broke.

The door clattered to the floor but my eyes were focused on the people standing in the doorway. My eyes were wide with fear as I saw who it was. It was the Volturi. No one from the Volturi I knew was there but by the Black cloaks and glowing red eyes I knew they were in fact the Volturi, and they were here to take me away from Edward.

Edward was growling beside me as Carlisle and Esme had jumped from their seats. Emmett was cracking his knuckles, how could they fight here. With all these people, human people, watching them.

Suddenly the group of the Volturi bolted forward as my soon-to-be family rushed forward to meet them. I saw as they collided with a sound louder than thunder before a pain shot up my spin. "BELLA!" I heard Edward scream before everything went black.

**I know, one it was too short and two it ended in a cliff-hanger but hey can't spoil to much of the story can I. Also at least I updated right. Right? audience glares But hey I think I'll give you a preview since I kinda made the chapter too short. **

**Preview for Chapter 3**

**Pain was shooting through my body rapidly, as I screamed. My body would not listen to me and it felt as if I was burning from the inside. I screamed again as another, more powerful, wave shot through me. All I could think about was the pain as it blocked out ever thought. And then, finally, I blacked out once again. **


	3. One Of Us

-1**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

I awoke gasping for breath as pain swept through me. It felt as if my body was on fire, burning me to my very core. I screamed as another wave of pain shot through me. I tried to find out where I was but the pain was to much and it made my head spin.

I realized though, that I was lying in a bed as my hair was messed and bunched. Another wave of pain came, even more powerful than the last, this time I fainted. I woke up again, as I was thrashing around i pain. I heard screams, that were tearing themselves from my throat.

I tried to call someone through my screams, that could make the burning subside. Pain continued to coarse through me, ripping me from the inside out. I screamed again and once again I blacked out.

This lasted for days, although my sense of time wasn't very good at the moment. I managed to look around the room I was in, as the pain had faded a little now. The wall was made of brown brick as there were no windows.

The bed was made of maple, its headboard was beautifully carved with Sakura petals. I knew I must have bee in the Volterra, the Volturi's prized city in Italy. I hoped Edward would come save me soon.

I could handle the pain now, as it seemed to be diminishing, but just incase I didn't want to lose any of my strength, I layed back down on the bed and quickly fell into a dream-less sleep.

I felt a thirst, a craving for something as I opened my eyes and sniffed. 'That smell' I thought as venom started to come from my tongue...Wait?! VENOM?! So that was it, the searing pain, the thirst, the venom, I was...

Suddenly the door to the room flung open and Jane walked in, a cruel smile on her face. "Congratulations" came her small voice, "Your one of us now"

**Done, another chapter over. Goodbye.**


	4. Why

-1**Yes a New Chapter! Sorry but I've have a lot to do. **

I stood motionless by my dresser, staring into my reflection on the mirror attached at the top. My topaz eyes reflected my sadness. He hadn't come, it had been one year since that tragic day and he hadn't come.

The more I thought of it the sadder I became. Oh how I wished I could cry at these moments! Suddenly all of my sadness turned into a raging fire of hatred and anger. Why?! Why hadn't he come for me, did he not want me anymore. Was I no longer good enough for him?

My clenched-fist slammed down on my oak dresser effectively destroying it. I needed to get out of here, this hell hole I was locked up in. I would escape and be free of this place. A cruel smile came to my lips a I forcefully opened my door and ran towards the meeting place of Aro and the others.

**With Edward...**

Alice stared at her brother with worry. He was nothing but a shell of his former self. Emmett could no longer make him smile, Jasper's powers didn't have an effect. Hell nothing made him happy anymore.

Why? Why couldn't he just go rescue her. "You know why Alice" Edward's voice rang out from his perch on the window sill. Edward kept staring into the distance, his fists clenched. Alice knew why he couldn't go get Bella. She knew what would happen if he even stepped foot in the Volterra.

He couldn't allow it to happen no matter how much he missed her. No matter how much he longed to be with her again.

**Bella pov...**

I smiled cruelly as I jumped from the hole into the dark streets of the Volterra. My black cape billowed in the steadily blowing wind. I quickly looked around, I wished not to be seen. I needed to get out of this city. But... My smile faltered downward and turned into a frown. Where would I go?

An idea suddenly popped into my head. A new smile came to my lips. Thsi one was different, though. This smile was happy, loving. I knew where I was going. Putting my hood up I started towards the cities exit. Now I was on my way to Florida.

**Edward pov...**

I couldn't take it anymore! I need to see her, I needed to be with her. To see her smile and hear her laugh. I could fight off the others. With these thought I ran to my silver Volvo and, careful not to harm the car, opened the door and started the ignition.

I backed out of my driveway and sped out towards the highway.

**Okay...End Chapter here. I know all of my chapters are short and I know all the changes in pov's are confusing but to get all I needed to in I had to change around the pov's a lot. But anyway it seems Bella has finally escaped and is on her way to Florida and that Edward is going to Italy! What will happen? Find out next time on "Why Must We Always Be Apart" **


	5. Secrets Should Remain Secrets

-1

**I know the last chapter was short so I'm updating right Away! So Here you go. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Edward pov...**

The flight to Italy was long and boring. 'But' I thought to myself, 'it would be worth it to see my sweet Bella again'. I jumped down the hole heading towards the lobby where the human secretary worked.

It was strangely quiet, so I sped up and busted open the doors to the lobby. My eyes widened, blood coated the walls as the human secretary,(insert her name here), was slumped over her desk a blood splattered letter clutched tightly in her hands.

I walked over to her and, ignoring the painful tightening at the smell of human blood, grasped the letter and pulled it from her hands. On the front in scribbled writing it said "_Edward_".

I opened my mind to see if I could find any other mind, anyone that could tell me what had happened. But there was nothing so, taking the letter, I dashed back the way I had come and found myself on a plane making my way back to Forks.

**Bella pov...**

I stepped off the plane to see the darkness of night and the street lights glaring near me. I followed the crowd and wondered how I had gotten so lucky. Stepping into the brightly lit airport I searched for my mom.

I found her waving enthusiastically, her husband, Phil, beside her. "BELLA!" My mother, Renee, called to me. She hugged me tightly and began telling me of what she and her husband had been doing. Then, surprising me, asked me why I hadn't called her.

My eyes widened, How could she forget, Unless... My eyes widened more so. "Bella your eyes are different!" Renee cried, "and your taller too" She touched my face and I struggled to ignore the venom that began flowing through my mouth and the itching, painful thirst that wound its way into my throat.

"Are you wearing colored contacts?" Renee asked me curiously. I nodded to her and she seemed convinced. As she led me to their car I just kept nodding to her. As we drove towards their house I began to wonder what I would do to stay out of the sun.

The drive didn't take long as my mom was soon showing me to the guest bedroom. My mom told me goodnight and I flopped down on the bed.

**With Edward...**

Edwards plane had just landed and the rest of the Cullens were waiting. Edward stepped into the crowded lobby of the airport, the letter still clutched tightly in his hands. "Edward your alright!" Esme cried as she hugged her adopted son. He didn't return the affection. "Edward, honey, what's wrong?" Esme asked as she stepped back to look at him. The Cullens gathered around him.

"She's not there..." Edward's voice was quiet, no more than a whisper. "Who's not there?" Carlisle questioned. "Bella" Edward answered. They stared at him in horror before quickly heading out of the airport and driving towards their home.

The drive was boring and Edward just stared blankly out the window, waiting until they were home to tell his family what had happened. When they arrived at the Cullen Mansion everyone rushed inside and had a seat in the spacious living room.

Edward retold what he had found before taking out the letter. "Read it Edward" Alice urged him in a haunted voice. "Yeah, maybe it will tell what happened" Emmett said, his usual carefree voice replaced with one of haunted eagerness.

Edward carefully ripped open the envelope and read aloud.

_Edward, _

_Aro told me to write this to you should anything get out of control and we could no longer sustain her. I'm sorry Edward.. After they took Bella, Aro wished to see what would happen if she was a vampire so... He transformed her. _

Edward paused for a moment mortified before continuing on.

_She was different Aro said. He said she never thirsted for human blood the way normal newborns do and that she kept her magnificent strength even after her one year mark. Edward you must understand she was for more powerful than they realized and could kill any one of us. She was immune to everyone's powers and had some of her own._

_I have to hurry though Edward. I think she has already killed everyone else and is probably coming for me now. Bella has only one weakness and that is-_

The letter stopped abruptly and blood stains dappled the bottom of the page. Edward looked up from the page at his family. Their perfect faces were creased with worry and horror. Emmett's fists were clenched and Alice's small hands had dug into the couch's arm.

Rosalie, not really ever caring about Bella, stared into the distance blankly. "It can't be true, Bella...Bella would never do such a thing!" Alice cried. "Apparently she did-" Edward was interrupted by Alice. "How could think that about Bella! How do you know its not a lie?!".

"I saw the body, Alice" Edward whispered sharply, "The whole underground city was deserted". Alice sank down into the couch and Jasper wrapped his arms around her. "Edward" Carlisle spoke up for the first time. "Don't" Edward whispered curtly before standing up and marching out the door.

**Edward pov...**

'There is no way Bella would never do such a thing!' I thought, 'Would she?' I continued to ponder as I wandered into the woods behind our house. 'Even if she did, where would she go?' Suddenly it came to me. The only place she could go.

'Florida! She has gone to Florida! Is she insane?! Even if her mother no longer remembers the wedding, she might be discovered! I have to go, I have to protect her!' And with these thoughts I was once again on my way to the airport.

**End Chapter! Aren't you so happy it is longer than the others! Bye!**


	6. Closer

-1**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to the brilliant mind of Stephenie Meyer. **

**Bella pov...**

I sighed as I looked out the window of my mother's home and into the sunny world outside. How I missed being able to go outside in the daylight. The ache for blood swelled in my throat as I watched a girl scrape her knee on the sidewalk outside.

I stood up from my seat on the window sill and walked into the living room of the deserted home. My mom's home was quaint and was near one of Florida's many beaches. It was not a very large home but it wasn't small either. It had three bedrooms, a dining room, a kitchen, a living room, two bathrooms, and a pantry.

This morning I had to pretend I was asleep after I heard my mom waking up and coming into the bedroom. After that she actually paid attention to me and noticed the purple bags that were under my eyes.

Renee insisted that I needed sleep and that I should stay in bed for the day. I nearly rolled my eyes when she said that, of course I needed sleep I hadn't slept in a little over a year. However she didn't know that and didn't need to.

When she was done telling me what I needed to do to relax and sleep she began telling me of how she and Phil wouldn't be home most of the day. Apparently he had a game or something of that sort.

My mom and my step-dad had left almost two hours ago. I sighed when I realized I had done absolutely nothing since they had left. As I looked around the living room I decided that I could straighten up the place for them.

Nodding to myself, I rearranged the cushions on the couch and picked up the trash that was on the coffee table. It didn't take long to clean up the room and I was soon bored again. I sighed again and plopped down onto the sofa and grabbed the remote.

Flicking through the channels until I found the news, I sank back into the cushions on the couch and watched as they told of a burglar that was on the loose after robbing a nearby bank.

I watched silently as they showed the bank that had yellow, caution tape wrapped around its doors. I sank even further into the cushions and decided to wait out the boring day until my mother arrived back at home.

**Edward pov...**

I sighed as I sat in one of the airports many chairs. Just my luck it would seem, the day I had to arrive in Florida it was bright and sunny. There was no way I would be able to go out the door without glittering as if I were made of diamond.

I sighed again and watched as families and couples walked by me either coming in or leaving the crowded airport. Sadness coursed through me as I watched them. They did not know how lucky they had it.

I felt eyes staring at me and nearly rolled my eyes. People always did this whether it was looking at me in fascination or of lust. I noticed one stare in particular, though, and decided to listen what the teenage girl was thinking.

'_**He is so Hot!' **_The girl's thoughts flooded into my head,**_ 'I wonder how old he is..' _**I shut the connection off, this girl could forget it I was not interested in her. The only girl I wanted was Bella and this person was nothing like her.

As soon as I shut the connection off and blocked the other mind's thoughts, my own were flooded with the thoughts of Bells. What would she look like now that she was a vampire? Why had she killed vampires hiding under the city? And the most disturbing one was Why didn't she come back to forks?

I mulled these questionable thoughts over and over in my head and when I came up with nothing my mind drifted again. I thought back to our wedding day...

**Flashback...**

"**Bella!" I screamed as Bella was knocked unconscious by one of the Volturi's members. I dodged an attack from another and tried to go after her but as soon as he had Bella in his arms he and the rest of the Volturi were gone. **

**I looked away from the spot and saw Carlisle looking towards me. I tapped into is thoughts and what resided there was something I already knew I must do. _'Edward, you'll have to wipe their minds. Look at them they are filled with fear and this would haunt them for the rest of their lives if you don't do this. I ask you if you will not just for us but for them'_. **

**I shut out Carlisle's thoughts and looked around the church. The humans were frozen in fear. Seeing Renee, I listened to her thoughts _'What were those things! They could have killed us and those Cullens were...were fighting them! What are they?! I hope Phil is alright?' _**

**I left her thoughts, disgusted by the fact she hadn't even noticed her own daughter was missing. I nodded my head when Carlisle and the rest of my adopted family looked at me questioningly. **

**I concentrated and proceeded to focus on all the minds around me. I began pulling out the memories of what happened today and the knowledge of the wedding day's date. I didn't know how long it would be until we found Bella but I wasn't taking any chances. **

**As soon as I was done most of the people who's minds I had wiped were now asleep. I smiled slightly and turned towards Carlisle who was approaching. "I did just what you asked of me Carlisle" I told him. **

**He nodded and the others gathered around me. Worry flooded back into my being and the others must have noticed as Esme came up to me and hugged me. I hugged back, happy for the comfort. **

"**Let's go, we don't want to be here when they wake up. Besides, we need to find out where the Volturi took Bella" Carlisle murmured quickly, to fast for human ears. I nodded and hurriedly followed them out of the church. **

**End Flashback...**

I was snapped out of my thoughts when my cell phone rang. Quickly flipping it open, I brought it to my ear and said "Hello". Alice's voice flowed into my ears "Edward why are you in Florida". She must have had a vision. "Looking for clues as to where Bella would be" I replied. She seemed satisfied and told me good luck. I said my thanks and hung up the phone.

I was suddenly aware that the airport lobby was nearly deserted. I turned towards the automatic doors and noticed the setting sun. 'Good' I thought 'This puts me one step closer to finding Bella'.

**Sorry it took me so long to update, I was busy. Yes I did give Edward a new power. I thought he deserved it and it really helped in the story's plotline. So I hope I'll get many reviews and hits! **


	7. Accident

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

_Coal black eyes glared at me, menacing, terrifying. A snarl built in my chest, and my lips pulled back over my own perfect teeth. Before me, he moved, crouching, waiting. "Why? Why didn't you come? Didn't you care enough, Edward?" I growled, my hurt and anger rising. _

_He chuckled, a dry chuckle. "Of course, I cared, Bella." I gasped, he did? "Then, why? Why didn't you come?" _

"_Because I couldn't, I love you, goodbye." He started to fade, his piercing eyes dissolving away. _

I gasped, and snapped back to reality. What was that? Obviously, it wasn't a dream, I mean, I can't sleep. So, what was it then? A vision, a prediction, an enigma?

I shook my head, I was alone, depressed, and confused, not a good combination. Renee and Phil had left again, this time going to meet some of their friends at a nearby club.

I settled into the couch and turned the scene over and over again in my head, examining it. Then, someone knocked on the door.

-scene change-

No! It couldn't be him, it just couldn't! What did he do? Track me? I bolted from the door and out the back way, it was a cloudy day, a rare one here, like sunny days are rare in Forks.

I heard him follow, not making a sound to human ears, but I could hear the wind moving, the unnecessary breaths he took. I was passing through the suburb, heading towards the swamp my mother had told me about in an email.

I dodged things easily, this coming almost naturally to me now. Suddenly, I was stopped and I struggled in the hold his arms had on me. "Let me go!" I screamed, struggling harder and, finally, breaking free.

I glared at him, snarling, crouching like a panther about to pounce. "What do you want, _Edward_?" I spoke coldly, and he seemed startled. "Why did you run?" He asked, as if he was confused as to why I didn't want him near, why I wasn't already there, letting him kiss me senseless.

"Because you have no right to be here, you have no right to be anywhere near me!" I hissed. He seemed surprised, and then recognition came to his face. "You actually believe I didn't want you back! Do you actually think I didn't want to come and get you while you were in Italy?"

"Of course, I do! What else could it be? I was there for a year, an entire year, Edward! Without any word, any help at all! What was stopping you from at least trying to get me?"

"They wouldn't let me, Bella! They told me that they would kill you! What other option did I have? I thought you were still human then, I knew they could kill you!" He cried, outrage, his eyes smoldering.

"You could have taken the risk, at least tried to see if I was okay! How did you know that they hadn't already killed me? Hmmm, answer that, Edward!"

"I didn't, Bella! That's one of the reasons I couldn't take any chances!"

My anger was fading and hurt was taking its place. I had to get out of here before he saw what a mess I actually was, so I jumped into the trees. Edward followed me searching until I began to use one of my powers.

"Not so easy to find me without a scent, is it Edward?" I began to mock him, hearing my voice echo through the swamp. He was swift, though, and easily traced my voice. "Why are you doing this, Bella?" He called; his voice hurt and yet still just a smooth and fluid as I remembered.

"Because, I can, Edward! I want to show you how it feels to not have help, to be alone and not knowing if you can see anyone ever again!" I was screaming now, but I didn't care, months of hopelessness, of having my heart crushed over and over again each day that he did not come.

I was so angry by now that the ground had begun to shake and flames of a blazing fire ignited in my palm. I threw the fire about a yard away from him, I didn't actually want to hurt him, I just wanted him to know that I meant business.

He jumped away from the fire and into a nearby tree, surprise flickering in his gaze as he finally found me. "How?"

I laughed, "I'm not like all of you, Edward. Unlike other vampires, I am immune to fire."

"What are you going to do now, Edward? Risk it and come close to me or stay away and be _safe_." I taunted, and nearly grinned when he growled. So I was finally making him angry.

I lit another fireball in my hand and held it in front of me, threatening him. I didn't expect him to come towards me, I didn't expect the fireball to shoot from my hand in a giant wave, I didn't expect to scream his name in a terrified voice when I realized what I had done, but it did.


	8. This Can't Be Happening

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

_Don't let it be true, don't let it be true, please if there is a god out there don't let it be true! _

Thoughts tumbled and spun through my mind, each one of them about the same thing. Over and over again they swirled, causing confusion on my part. I don't think I could feel anything at that moment, not with all that was happening around me and what was going on in my mind.

The smoke from the fire ball was clearing. Was Edward okay? Was he still alive?

_Please, let him be okay. Please, I didn't mean to._

Dry sobs were escaping my throat, why did this happen? _**How**_ could I have done this?

In front of me, the smoke was almost gone, causing me to desperately clutch to the hope that Edward was still alive, that somehow he had survived the onslaught of heat. I was desperately waiting, just inches away from where the fire had hit.

I drew in a unnecessary breath when all of the smoke was gone. I quickly shut my eyes before I could see. What was going to be there? A pile of ashes? A crumpled body? Or a miracle?

I hesitantly opened my eyes, just enough to peek through the lashes of my eyes, then I screamed.

There was no way a miracle had occurred. So, why was it that Edward was in front of me?

I looked closer, dark splotches of ash were smeared across his face, the end of his right sleeve was charred, and it looked as if the bottoms of his shoes were slightly melted.

Was this a ghost? Had he come back to haunt me? And if that was true was there only a pile of ash where his immortal body should have been?

I fell to my knees. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I was still heaving dry sobs, my entire body shaking. 'Edward' was still standing in front of me, as still as a statue.

Who wouldn't be though? I had just killed him!

"Damn it! How could I have done this!!" My cries were becoming louder. My body was shaking horribly. I couldn't bear to look up at the betrayed face above me.

"I didn't mean to, I didn't mean to…" I was only mumbling by now, it was all I could get out.

Nothing made sense anymore. Maybe this was all a dream. Maybe, just maybe, I was never kidnapped by the Volturi and I was still asleep on the night before my wedding!

That had to be it, this world made no sense and the other one does because that world is real and this one is not.

Just to make sure, I used my hand to pinch my arm. Nothing happened.

"No." I whispered, "No, no, no, NO!!" The last one a screamed, looking up at the face of my beloved by accident.

He was looking at me with a mixture of emotions. Betrayal, confusion, and something like sympathy were swirling about his eyes and face. His jaw was set at a perfectly straight angle, rigid and unmoving.

"You tried to kill me." His voice was stony, agonized. Probably from the way he died.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to I swear! I was just so angry." I thing I'm going insane, here I am talking to a ghost who probably can't even speak. "I didn't mean to kill you, really I-I didn't, it j-just sort of happened."

Something must have clicked in 'Edward's' mind because his eyes widened and he laughed bitterly.

"Silly Bella! How can I be dead if I am standing right here?"

I jumped to my feet. "You could be if you were a ghost!"

He shook his head, "If I were to die do you really think that I would become a ghost? Sent to hell to rot, yes, but a ghost? Really Bella?"

"What else could you be? Obviously, it's my fault that you're dead and it would only make sense that you would come to haunt me because of it."

"Bella, you aren't being reasonable."

"Of course I'm not being reasonable! I wanted to hide my hurt over you so badly that I accidentally killed you! I'm so stupid."

'Edward' seemed confused or a moment. "You were hiding you hurt? Over what?"

I hesitated but then what could it hurt to tell him if he was already dead? "The only reason I was angry with you and ran away was because I was hurt, am still hurting, when you never came to get me from that place."

His eyes softened, just the way the real Edward's would have.

"Bella, I tried to explain this to you before. The only, and I mean only, reason that I didn't come to find you was because I was convinced you would be killed. I couldn't risk your life."

My eyes would have watered if I was still human.

"Couldn't you have taken a chance? Just to see?" The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"No. I will never risk your life, not even to see you. I couldn't stand to think that I might cause you pain even if it means causing it to myself."

"But you did cause me pain, Edward." I looked down, breathing the words. " Did you know that I hoped you would come each day that I was there? I hoped and hoped, and you never came, Edward! How do you think that made me feel?!" I was acting ridiculous, I knew and I tried to stop the dry sobs and words that tumbled from my mouth.

"Even so, it was better than having you die."

I shook my head. "If you had come than I would been the one to die and you wouldn't be dead right now!"

"We have been apart for so long. Have you gone crazy while we were apart? Didn't you hear me earlier? I said that you _**tried**_ to kill me, not that you succeeded. You didn't succeed." He was shaking his head now, his bronze hair falling over his eyes.

"No, I threw a fire ball at you, it killed you and it's all my fault." I had accepted it, I was the one to kill Edward and the ghost of him was trying to take the guilt away from me.

When I glanced up again, 'Edward' was closer to me, he could have easily reached out and touched me, but he was a ghost now so he couldn't touch me even if he wanted to.

That's what surprised me the most when I felt arms wrap around me and breath blow through my hair.

"Bella, how many times must I tell you to get it through this skull of yours? I am not dead, you shot your fire ball at me and I escaped before it burned me. Can't that make sense to you?"

I shook my head. It couldn't be true, could it? All of the evidence was pointing to what he was saying. A ghost couldn't put his arms around me and Edward's story made sense.

"How can you stand to be near me? I tried to kill you, remember?" The guilt was eating away at me, he was alive but that didn't take away what I had done.

He sighed, "Bella, I'm just to much to blame for this as you are. If I hadn't moved when you told me not to, we wouldn't be in this situation."

I glared at him, how could he think this was his fault? "Don't you dare think that! I was the one that threatened and taunted you, you had every right to stick up for your pride!"

"My pride? You thought I did that to stick up for my pride?" He was smiling again, the same bitter way he did when I thought I was dead before. I couldn't contain the laughter that followed.

"Bella? Was I right, have you gone insane?" He was holding me tightly and I was glad that he didn't show hesitation in touching me.

"Doesn't this seem familiar to you? This is just like what happened after I met the Volturi, remember? Except last time I thought I was dead and this time I thought you were dead."

This time his smile was not as bitter and his eyes were not as clouded. "It is similar isn't it? Then do I really have to explain why I moved?"

If it was the same as last time, then no he didn't. "How could you not hate me though?"

"Bella, I've killed a lot of people and you don't hold that against me."

"But that's different, that was a long time ago, this is something that just happened, something that you should feel hatred and anger toward!"

"I admit that I am slightly angry that you would do such a thing, but that is covered up by the happiness in the fact that you're letting me hold you." He clutched me tighter to prove his point.

I hadn't even noticed that he was holding me, I guess that it was just something that I was so used to that I hardly thought about it but now that it was on my mind, it really did feel good to be here.

"I think we need to talk about this, Edward. Rena and Phil shouldn't be back for a while, we could go there and talk." I was treading in dangerous territory, I had to be cautious.

His smile was a relief to me, it was still hesitant but it was close to the crooked smile that I loved. "I would love to, Bella. Just don't try to kill me again, please and no candles, fireplaces, or anything that would make you want to start a fire."


	9. Thirsty

**Disclaimer: I do not own these characters they belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

_What are you thinking about? _Edward asked himself as he watched his once girlfriend move about the room, straightening up pillows and seemingly trying to make everything more comfortable, even if she didn't have to.

He continued to ponder as he followed Bella to the couch and sat down, gracefully. It was a question that plagued him, haunted him. Why did she have to be the one person whose thoughts he couldn't hear? It was so frustrating, not knowing and always wondering.

He leaned back against the couch, waiting for Bella to break the silence and after a few moments, she did.

"Um, well…I guess we have a lot to talk about don't we? We should get started if we want to get everything sorted out before Renee and Phil get back…" She began, fiddling with a piece of dark hair before pushing it behind her ear.

Edward's eyes followed the movement, tracing inches of skin as the muscles flexed and engraving them into his memory for safe keeping. Slowly, his gaze traveled up, over her neck and farther, until finally reaching her darkening eyes.

"You're thirsty, how long has it been since you've had anything to drink?" He realized that he should start out with a topic that was neutral-and necessary it seemed at the moment-so that he could regain some of her trust and try to find some of his own.

"I haven't really thought about it…just a few days, more or less." She frowned, thinking back and counting.

"Maybe it would be better if we found something, then talked?" Edward suggested, staring intently at her. If she couldn't remember to nourish herself he would just have to be around to remind her, he concluded this to himself.

Bella sighed but she couldn't really object, she was thirsty after all. "Fine."

-scene change-

Pouncing quickly, Bella flew at the animal and swiftly sunk her teeth into its fleshy neck. Drinking fluidly, she was suddenly urged to look up and over slightly to her right, where subconsciously she knew that Edward was feasting on his own animal.

What she didn't expect, however, was the bolt of something akin to desire and longing that bolted through when their eyes connected and suddenly her lips were not longer placed upon the neck of the animal, but instead, they were smashed against the equally willing pale ones of one she loved.

Throwing caution to the wind and forgetting momentarily about the sorrows and guilt of the past, she slung her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. She moved obediently backwards as he guided her along and barely registered when the stony skin of her back met the rough bark of a tree.

Breaking apart for unnecessary air, the two panted and drew back. Edward met her eyes one more time before growling deeply and latching onto the deathly pale skin of her neck.

Bella's eyes fluttered closed and she tilted her head to one side, allowing him better access. She breathed a moan of protest when he released her neck and panted against her ear, his lips skimming across them lightly and causing her to shiver.

"Not here, let's go back to your house." He whispered, nudging his nose against the side of her head.

"Can't," She spoke, "Phil and Renee are probably back by now and they would freak if they saw us like this."

"Then, we'll go to my hotel room." His voice rumbled and sounded slightly like a purr and Bella couldn't help but allow herself to be pulled away.

-scene change-

Edward kicked the door shut behind him and pushed Bella back until she was spread out on the bed, panting and looking up at him. He groaned slightly and claimed her rosy lips again, allowing her to break once more to tug of his shirt.

She threaded he fingers into his hair and allowed his tongue entrance into her mouth.

Just outside the window the sun was beginning to set, casting a beautiful glow around the area but even it went ignored by the two in the room.


	10. Note

Dear Readers,

Many of you have asked me to continue and some of you have asked if I am going to continue writing at all. Yes, I will be continuing all of my stories. For "To Begin Again" I already have the plot, I just need to write the chapters. For my other stories, I have written bits and pieces of further chapters, I just need to string them together.

I'm sorry you have had to wait on me so long, I just haven't been able to write very much lately. Please me patient with me :/… I'll try to have some chapters posted by next week and, hopefully, I'll be able to write them.

Love to all,

SesshyLover132


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